S#@t You Might Actually Hear This Candidate Say
"I love to promote hatred in a slow, calculated cadence."
"Immigrants are bad. I'm from Canada."
"When I become prime minister... er president."
"Dis me" -------->
"So, maybe we can, umm, address a few things..."
"Best-crafted Floyd album? ... Animals, for sure. You got your socio-political critique of late '70s Britain, it's an allusion to Animal Farm, some soft and sweet acoustic guitars, Gilmour's guitar sings, you've got a pig floating between two chimneys, and that song Dogs rules, it was a success in the music charts. It's great, guys really really great. Good work."
"[Countless facts] about how f#@ked up everything in America is."
"Yeah I don't know how to do it, maybe I'll ask the Norwegians."
"I can definitely read."
"Let's not destroy each other, but let's kill some people."
"I am not post-racist, I'm un post-racist.
"No one ever lets me speak, but when they do, I don't really have anything to say, so I just say a bunch of words I think sound important and repeat myself a bunch and say words I think sound important and smile."
"I'm a brain surgeon...?"
Get to Know
This is barely satire!
"Political Class" is an a-political comic strip by Jerry & Larry Larson-- a father & daughter comic strip duo that emerged from Minnesota in the mid-eighties. These are proofs from a set trading cards "Debate of Thrones" (2016).
"Raw chicken please."
"In 1999, when I lost the part in She's All That to Freddie Prinze Jr., I vowed forever to run for president. Here I am, bitches."
"But I don't want the silver spoon, I want the gold one! WAAAAAH!"
"So, I'm looking for a top."
"It's too loud in here, I have to go."
"Nahhh, I'll take a Zima."
"I don't really 'get' art, but the lib populace likes it, right?"
"Gas station eggs and fig newtons are my road trip snacks of choice."
"What Bernie said."
"Whatever gets me the job."
"I hire people, the good ones. I'll decide what's good."
"I've been working with a personal trainer to build strong DSL."
"I'm a negotiator. I will bring peace. Shut up. Gimme yr lunch, pussy."
"LET'S BUILD A WALL."
"Learning history is gay" ::rolls eyes.::
"I'm glad Christy is out, he's a [filthy word] bully.”
Jerry & Larry Larson
The Political Class presents...
Debate of Thrones
"We don't need a wall on the Mexican border. Just fill the Rio Grande with water from Flint.”
"In terms of species, I am the only human on this stage."
"Hi... hello? Can I say somesing?"
Sh#@t You Might
Actually Hear This